Easy as Pi

Some things in life aren’t easy. Like the other day, when I had to tell tough tattooed teen, aka, my nephew, that our sheepdog Peaches had died…in the 1990s. My sister hadn’t wanted to break the news to him, so when he came over and asked, “Where’s Peaches?” my grocery cashier brother said the first thing that came to his mind: “She went to the store.” Which was a problem, because whenever my nephew went to a store he would ask, “Is Peaches here?” So I morphed the story over the years, to the point in which we were sitting around a waiting room and I mentioned missing having a dog and he responded by saying, “Then you really shouldn’t have sent Peaches away to live on a sheep farm.” As all the adults in the room gave me that knowing look I said, “Oh, yeah. That farm…up north…”

Way up north…

Where she enjoys chasing sheep to this day…

Other things in life are easy. Like when the supervisor asked everyone if they wanted to bring in pies for Pi Day. Americans have never needed an excuse to eat dessert, though we will grab latch onto one if possible. There was apple pie, cherry pie, banana cream pie, peanut butter pie, unidentifiable-yet-good-looking pie, and I brought cookies. I figured we’d get sick of pie, but no one gets sick of cookies. This is how I ended up at home groaning from with the trifecta of allergies, an overly full stomach, and forcing myself to exercise when all I wanted to do was lie on the couch rubbing my eyes while my family yelled, “Stop touching your face!” But this is okay, because the next day someone brought in a vegan veggie pie, which, like hitting Ctrl Alt Delete and clicking restart, is the equivalent of a new beginning.

Another easy thing is tile crafts. I did this a few years ago. Back before I realized the only people who should attempt renovations themselves are either HGTV hosts or married to them, I would wander home improvement stores for ideas, until I came up with the best one yet---buying a brand new home. During one of these trips I came across 4x4 tiles marked 75% off and thought, “Wouldn’t it be cute to let the kids decorate them with Sharpies?” Normally I would clear a store out of good deals, but those puppies are heavy! When an employee offered to load them into the cart I was tempted to ask, “Can you take them all the way to work for me?” Thus I settled for a reasonable amount I could lift without a back brace.

Decorative Tiles

Supplies:
Plastic tablecloths
Tiles
Sharpies
Rubbing alcohol
Towels

1. Cover the tables with tablecloths.
2. Give sharpies and tiles to children. Unlike teens, you can give pens to children without too much worry. It’s the parents that will be totally freaking out at the thought of their child getting permanent markers on their clothes. Like the time we used tempura paints, this is one craft program you won’t hear any parents asking, “Is it okay if I leave my child here?”
3. Try not to laugh out loud as you see parents trying to pry pens out of their 6 year olds' hands because they look like they might be aiming for skin.
4. Clean up the tables with rubbing alcohol and paper towels.

I woke up this morning in the mood for ABBA. Maybe I needed a pick me up from the rainy weather. Maybe it’s the allergy medication traveling through my system. Whatever it is, I’m most likely going to go home, break out my ABBA sheet music and give it a try…after I take a long nap and eat takeout…

Having a Party

I will say that despite literally crawling into bed after almost passing out in the shower from exhaustion (and wondering if SPL has hazard pay) that hosting a big Dr. Seuss Day was totally worth it. Everyone had so much fun! There were those looks on the kids’ faces, and the happy looks on the faces of the fathers as they got to see Lance Briggs, and staff was happy to see him, too!

Briggs was extremely nice. He hung out in the staff room with his family beforehand and I heard someone say, “He’s sitting in that chair! We must never wash it!” Which I wasn’t even thinking of doing, meaning it will never get washed, so one wish down; what are your other two?

He read “Green Eggs and Ham” in the big purple chair with a gazillion people listening. Then he signed sign autographs and took pictures for 40 minutes. When trying to round up the staff I thought, “Staff would be upset if we don’t take a photo, but the guys my kill me if I don’t include them.”
Someone pointed out that I’m right next to Briggs in the photo. Yes, I am. After giving half of Logistics my cell number to work out, well, logistics, and breaking my nails while setting out parking cones while everyone else was meeting downtown, I would have happily elbowed the Pope to get by him.

You may also want to steer clear of me if I’m clothes shopping.

That said, Lance Briggs was the highlight of the day, but by no means the only thing going on. We did lots of stuff---crafts, storytimes, face painting, giveaways, refreshments, etc.--- that are easy to duplicate at any branch. When doing something big, thinking inside the box is actually more important than thinking outside of it. Thinking outside the box usually costs money. That’s fine for members of the Jersey Shore or if you’re married the future king of England (if his grandmother doesn’t succeed in living forever). The rest of the world has budgets. Besides, we already have the box---it’s sitting in your storage room…and under your desk...and in that room near the “dungeon,” aka, the scary storage space in Central’s basement. You are surrounded by and know how to do plenty of stuff already. Just do more of it at once. (And schedule a massage for the next day.)

Crafts: I’ve already posted instructions for all of these crafts. They just needed tweaking for the event.

Lanterns---Kids made lanterns from Dr. Seuss coloring sheets
Postcards---Dr. Seuss coloring pages were set 4 to a page and printed on the back of postcard templates.
Flags---More Dr. Seuss, this time in colorable flag form.

Napkins and gloves: We used the latex gloves from the janitorial closet (yes, they are food safe), and obtained napkins from the surplus supply list.

Face painting: Did you know YS has a face painting kit? What I thought would be some intricate hard-to-use mash up of paints was actually a colorful kit that looked like crayons. Though we brought in Just for Fun face painters from 3-5, we needed something for the smaller children who showed up from 1-3. A volunteer made painted simple designs that pleased your average toddler.

Storytime activities: I can honestly say I did not plan to do additional activities, but when some kids began to get restless I ended up shaking shaky eggs and flapping around like a bird.

Read to a Dog: Since we already have a regular service dog literacy program, I contacted the leader to see if additional dogs could come in.

Scooter the Safety Dog: Scooter was kind enough to join us for a storytime, so I called to see if he was available to visit that day. The children enjoyed the mascot (save for the ones who went screaming to their mommies) and Scooter’s handler read “The Lorax” to an enraptured crowed, and scooter also flapped his "wings" right along beside me for storytime activities.

Giveaways: People have commented that I have the cleanest children’s librarian space they’ve been to. This is because of my “Everything must go! Give it away, give it away, give it away now!” policy I developed towards kids stuff so that a certain librarian who shall remain nameless (she's the sup at CHS) wouldn't strangle me when we worked together. Unlike Twinkies, kids’ giveaways have a shelf life. Erasers die. Popular book titles get old. Paper looks like it’s been attacked by mice. You have about a 6 month window to turn your clutter into someone else’s prize before it starts slowly drifting into the trash column. We gave away books, pencils, bookmarks, tattoos (thanks Scooter!), and pretty much any item that wasn’t nailed down.

Volunteers: The volunteers were excellent. Even my nephew did a good job manning the giveaway table, though he complained, “Those kids kept mobbing me!” They came on time, if not early, stayed longer than I thought, and they were extremely hard working.

If you’re looking for something special to do for summer reading, don’t be afraid---go for it. And remember, even if you don’t have tons of cash to spend, there might be a boxed program or two (or five) you can borrow to help make that special day just so much more specialer.

Yes, that’s a made up word.

Spa Day!

One of my favorite pastimes is shopping. I’m good at it, plus it means I’m not at home about to half-strangle my teenage nephew for wearing that same gross sweatshirt I want to burn for three weeks straight to cover up that tattoo he got. If you don’t have teens at home, here’s the scoop: when children are toddlers you count to 10. When they are preschool age you count to 3. And when they’re teenagers, you just keep counting and hope that by the time they are 25 you’ll have stopped counting and your hair will still be its original color without the help of dye.

So while I’m out mumbling numbers to myself throughout the aisles while wishing my sister had a job that didn’t require travel, I buy gifts (already started on Christmas!), clothes that look familiar because I already own similar items, and items for future programs. After Christmas is a good shopping time. Others see red, green and stars and think of Christmas. I see red and think of Valentine’s Day; I see green and think of St. Patrick’s; and the stars have me thinking of pretty much every federal holiday between May and November. Thus when I was out after Easter one year, I didn’t simply see colorful baskets with a 90% of tag and think of delicious boiled eggs smeared in Miracle Whip; I thought of Mother’s Day…and how my brother made me look bad by buying Mom a Movado watch when I simply took her out to dinner and gave her a scarf.

Since he paid for that trip to Aruba I guess I’ll forgive him.

This basket is fairly easy to make, so a good pairing for it would be the Felted Soap box program. It’s also fairly cheap. That said, if you want a lot of baskets at a decent price, please call the store manager to make arrangements beforehand.

Spa Day Program Supplies:
Felted Soap box program
Easter baskets (or on sale gift bags if you can’t find them)
Mini body scrubbers (5/$1.00 at the Dollar Tree)
Bath salts (scroll for instructions and supplies)

Optional basket items:
Face towels (I found some bulk at Big Lots)
Mini bubbles (found in the wedding section in Target and other stores)
Tissue paper
Ribbon
Card
1. Make bath salts and felted soaps.
2. Arrange in the basket. Tissue paper at the bottom will make this look nicer. So will tying on a bow and inserting a card.

Bath Salt Supplies:
Epsom salts (bulk, or at the Dollar Tree)
Food coloring
Essential oils (Can buy at GNC for $5-$6 dollars)
Small containers for scooping (I use the containers from individual applesauce packages)
Ziploc bags (if this is for kids I let them just keep them in this)
Plastic baggies (NOT Ziploc) and ribbon (for teen and adult programs)
Volunteers

Optional salt containers:
Glass baby food jars or yogurt jars (from Trader Joe's---put out your feelers)
Rubber bands
Fabric squares (purchase at Joann’s)

The instructions are really straight forward. I print them out on 3 sheets of paper using 85 point Times New Roman font, set them out in a row on a table, and let people go down the line:

1. Place 1 scoop of salt inside a zip-top bag.
2. Place 2-3 drops of food coloring inside the bag. Seal and shake.
3. Add 1-2 drops of essential oil (see volunteer). Seal and shake.

Afterwards teens and adults can transfer their salts into plastic bags and tie it with ribbon. It you have glass jars place fabric squares overtop of the lids, secure with a rubber band, then tie on a ribbon.

Your finished product will look failry impressive for a "mere" library program, so if possible make up a basket beforehand and put it on display.



I'm still trying to let the death of Whitney Houston sink in. I got the text between discovering my nephew's tattoo and going to a party. At first I thought it was a joke, since I turned on the radio and, thanks to a lack of live DJs, the folks were talking about Chris Brown (at whom my nephew screams, "Woman beater! Woman beater!" whenever he sees him) and I figured my friend got it all wrong. Apparently she didn't. This is completely horrible, and I guess I'll spend some time watching the copy of The Bodyguard I bought last month, and continue singing "I Will Always Love You" in the shower (which I was I doing even before her passing).

We Like To Move It, Move It!

Tomorrow or Monday (or before the Mayan Apocalypse) I’ll post my personal feelings on The Help. But for now, you’ll have to be satisfied with tips on advertising.

Ever pass by those poor, unfortunate souls whose job it is to hold signs while dressed like inanimate objects? Simultaneously you think, “I wonder how many calories that burns…” and, “Wow, cell service for only $9.99 a month!” It’s catchy, but you won’t find any librarian dressed as a hot dog while doing the Running Man on the corner to advertise a cooking program.

At least not outside the Elk Grove Library.

Yet sometimes you feel as if you need to wear a sandwich board to get people into your programs, which is almost as unflattering as dressing as a questionable meat product. Programs are listed on Evanced, in calendar, but when you see stacks of flyers collecting dust you wonder if only you and the crickets for your event. However, you can get these flyers out the door in a method that doesn’t involve you tossing them in the recycle bin, cutting them into note paper, or standing at the door like a bouncer at a night club.

The reason many flyers are sitting about is the white and mint green bookmark that list tax prep info blends with the white and mint green bookmarks you set out last week that lists storytimes, which blends with the ones on some writing contest sponsored by professional wrestlers, which means none of them get moved out the door. But if you draw attention to them, about every 3rd person who asks about them will pick them up, and maybe, just maybe, take them home.

Moving the Bookmarks

Supplies:
Decorations
Library Bookmarks
Crayons
Pens
Ribbon and/or twine
Hole puncher
Scissors

1. The Eye Catcher
I brought this glittery red tree to the library several years ago after I bought it for myself but my family looked at me as if I needed an intervention. Yet it goes great with these flyers for our Dr. Seuss program featuring Chicago Bear Lance Briggs that happens on Friday, March 2nd from 1-5 pm.
2. The Post-Story Craft
I know, kids’ crafts are supposed to be interactive, but have you ever tried interactive with 80 people? Doesn’t work too well. So I give them bookmarks of upcoming events, chat up the event, then have them decorate the back with crayons, (washable!) pens and stickers. Kids love stickers. Even if you run out you’ll come over and see they’ve adhered the sticker outline to their forehead and are having fun running around, ‘cause that’s what you do when you’re 2 years old.
3. The Official Bookmark
This is the best one because it gives teen volunteers something to do (quietly, at a table far, far away from you), and it makes the bookmarks so attractive that people will spot it, pick it up, then come to the front desk to ask, “Can I have this?” Which is when you say, “That bookmarks for our Friday Stitch and Chat program, and we would love for you to keep one of those bookmarks.” Simply punch a hole in the top of the bookmark and tie on a ribbon or twine. (I colored the twine with a pen because I was desperate to use up stuff we already own.) Tapering the side with scissors is optional.

Hopefully these ideas will get the flyers flying out the library!

Let Me Help You---Part 1

I could seriously talk for hours about my opinion on The Help---and I will...well I won't talk for hours, just write something you can read in 5 minutes before moving on with life. And I'll do that. Next week...I think. Right now I’m getting ready for Chicago Bear Lance Briggs to read at Elk Grove Library for Dr. Seuss Day on Friday, March 2nd at 3:30 pm, and that prep takes precedence over my opinion. For now you’ll have to be satisfied with info on how to prep book-t0-movie programs.



The Help

Supplies:
Advertisement
The DVD
The book
A copy of the book discussion questions
A copy of movie discussion questions (see below)
Popcorn (food is always good)

1. Advertise. Since we’re not allowed to actually say the title online, this can be tricky. In the past I’ve called Movlic.com for clarification, and their guidelines DO change from time to time, but in general you can mention the movie’s year, the main actors, and a general summary of what the movie is about---plus put in the Telis phone number for those who can’t figure out that the latest animated feature with the voices of Tom Hanks and Tim Allen is Toy Story 3. (If you have kids around you probably can’t even remember where you set your keys.) Put flyers up around the branch, and push programs at other programs. Example: I’ve set out flyers for programs in the meeting room while they’re doing tax help. I also pressed more flesh than a politician in hopes I wouldn't be talking to an empty room.

2. Read the book. Seriously. It helps when it comes to discussing things. Otherwise you sound like an ill-prepared high school student. (“I love The Chocolate War because I love chocolate. Chocolate is the best thing in the world. Don’t you love chocolate, too? I ate some this morning.”) With 15-20 programs to deal with per storytime month, I set aside storytime-free December to read it before I was once again bombarded by toddlers.

3. Go over the book discussion questions. There are others online, but I started with these.

4. After watching the movie be prepared to discuss the book and the movie for a loooooong time. The meat of our discussion lasted for over 40 minutes. It was nearly 4 pm when the last people straggled out of the room---the movie had started at 12 noon! But, the plus side of viewing The Help is that everyone feels guilty about leaving you to clean up by yourself, so you suddenly have all these people putting away chairs and asking if they could sweep.

Before doing this program I was concerned patrons might come in upset about the movie. Then I realized that most people hate trying to park in our parking lot and wouldn't come here unless it was for something good. The people who showed up in general had read the book and they were ready to articulate their feelings without beating one another with sticks. I started out with the book questions, and we continued on from there.

My made up questions:

What was your favorite scene in the movie?

What book scenes would you have liked to have seen included in the movie but were omitted?

What parts of the movie/book bothered/disturbed you?

How do you feel the movie could have been better?

Describe your reaction to hearing Skeeter’s mother, who did not work, cook, clean, run errands, raise her own children, or even provide her own food items for fundraisers denigrate African American domestic workers as “only being in it for the money.”

Upon finding Jim Crow literature in Skeeter’s bag, Hilly confronts her and states, “There are some real racists in this town.” Did you see this as Hilly being a hypocrite, or did you take this as a veiled threat? Please explain your reasons why.

What type of stereotypes did you see in the movie?

Minny mentioned that the maids were afraid to ask for minimum wage and their employers were not doing Social Security set asides. What are the implications of such practices today?

What do you feel would best describe your interactions with “The Help” of today?

Do you feel, in regards to today’s domestic labor, that our interactions with them are fine or are they tinged more with racism, sexism, classism, or something else? Explain your answer.

Motherhood is described as the “toughest job in the world.” People say if mothers were paid they would receive anywhere from $40,000 to over $100,000. Yet the median wage of a child care worker in 2008 was $9.12, or less than $19,000. Why do you feel there is such a large discrepancy between the two numbers?

Are you the help? How do you feel you are treated?

What are some things we can do to better our interaction of those serving us today? (Hint, if you come into the library and don’t get your way, don’t scream, “My taxes pay for your job!”)

General topics discussed:

Hypocrisy. The white employers were raising money to feed African children yet were demeaning their African American employees. Was it that they just didn’t get it, or that fundraising was all part of the show?

Race. That actually took up a lot of our time.

Mothers as being universal figures. (Skeeter’s mom sounded like half of our mother’s---“You’re eggs are dying!”)

Other movies that had unsettling relationships between employers and domestics. (Crash stood out.)

Redlining and segregation. I learned in one college class that upper class blacks actually live in neighborhoods with greater poverty than lower class whites due to segregation. One a neighborhood reaches about 12% black, white flight takes place. My hometown (Chicago) was recently declared the most segregated city in America. When you look around your neighborhood, what color faces do you see? Have they changed dramatically?

Female roles and sexism. Skeeter wanted a career. Elizabeth Leefolt was clearly not cut out for motherhood. Yet during this time period women were not only expected to get married and have children, women were commonly fired once their pregnancies started to show. One patron discussed how not only did potential employers ask her if she was pregnant when applying for an interview, they asked her for the date of her last period!

For my opinion on The Help, stay tuned…



Happy Super Bowl!

Rose Red (Or Pink)

This shorter blog will soon be followed by a longer blog because last Saturday I showed The Help. Seeing as this library gets so empty on Saturdays I’m surprised I don’t see tumbleweed rolling down the aisle, I was shocked when people not only came for the movie, they stayed for the discussion.

We talked.

And talked...

And kept talking.

Forty minutes later I wound the discussion down; some people stayed until almost 4 pm. They asked, “When’s the next movie discussion?” To which I thought, “Can I recover from this one?” Program prep translated into reading the book, watching the movie, creating questions, reading reviews and criticisims, and, of course, finding someone to operate the popcorn machine because I really didn’t feel like cleaning it.

So…

For those who want to know about “The Help” and get discussion questions, come back next week.

About that craft…

By now everyone knows how much I love paper and its dehydrating effects on my hands. So when I saw construction paper so old it gets a pension, I thought why not use it for Valentine’s postcards? It’s simple, you can’t tell the paper was bought during Regan’s first term, and it uses up our old flyers. This is good for drop in crafts.

Heart-Shaped Roses Postcards

Supplies:
Kiddy scissors (even if they beg for the sharp kind)
Tape
Construction paper---full sheets
Scrap paper---assorted colors
Old half-sheet bookmarks
Valentine’s postcard templates
Glue stick
1. Cut the full sheet construction paper into quarters; cut the postcard templates out. Cut the half-sheet flyers in half. Trim about ¼ of an inch off the top and one side.
2. Glue the template to one side of the postcard.
3. Glue the old flyer to the other side of the postcard.

4. Using scrap paper, cut out 5 heart shapes and stems. Tape the stems to the back of the flowers.
5. With the flowers face down, place arrange them in a bouquet and tape them to one another.
6. Tape the flowers to the front of the postcard, preferably with double-sided tape. If you would like to keep one as a sample, I recommend laminating it.

Someone got me thinking of old school R&B, so I hope you like Boyz II Men. Enjoy!

Easiest. Craft. Ever.

It’s nearly Valentine’s Day---time for chocolate, cards, and/or burning all of your ex’s stuff. It used to be you only hosted parties for happy events. “Look, I’m getting married/having a baby/cured my bad case of hangnails!” Now you can celebrate Anti-Valentine’s Day or throw a divorce party with a “Bring Your Own Bottle” note in the invitation. (Though technically speaking, many would say divorcing someone you loathe is a happy event, too.) Honestly, I was ready to leave that one after the cops showed up, but I was vetoed and had to stay until I crawled out to the car at 2 am while complaining, “I went to work today! Or yesterday! What day is it? Why did you have to put ‘no kids’ in the invite? What kind of crappy parent would even think to bring their kids to this type of party anyway?”

Don’t answer that.

Typically we make cards for Valentines, but depending on whom you send cards to (males), it can be a complete waste. My mother was ready to strangle my brother through the phone when she discovered he’d tossed her beautiful $6 Christmas card. In his defense he said, “What else did you want me to do with it?” Survey says: she wanted you to keep it. Not forever. But at least until January 1st. “From now on he gets the cheap cards!” Another relative didn’t even bother to open his card. His response: “Oh, I threw it away. Thanks for the gift.” I wish I had been there to see him digging through the dumpster when he discovered I’d put money in it. Had he not found the envelope I was completely ready to lie and say, “There was $500 in that envelope! I can’t believe you threw away $500! I should be reimbursed!”

That would have made it the second best Christmas ever.

So it is officially established cards are off the list for men, but what’s an alternative? The following is an easy craft perfect for children to give to their parents, broke teenagers to give to each other, and women to give that special someone that screams, “I like you, but you’re not particularly useful and your FICO score is too low for this to go to the next level.”

Decorative Mugs
Supplies:
Ceramic mugs from IKEA
Sharpies---assorted colors
Rubbing alcohol
Paper towels
A watchful eye
Chocolate (optional)

1. Number the Sharpies. Honestly, the hardest part of this craft is keeping track of the pens.

2. Give each person 1 mug and 1 pen. Explain that when they are done they have to return the pen.

3. If they complain about the pen's color and, “I want purple!” tell them whining is not attractive and they need to switch with another person because you’re not giving them 2 pens and that’s life.

4. Let them decorate the mugs.

5. After they are finished decorating (which takes a lot longer than it seems possible with all the talking) get back 1 pen from each of them, not letting them leave until every pen is accounted for.

6. If a teen tells you they don’t have a pen, explain they’d better make one materialize out of thin air or prove there’s a ghost in the room.

7. Realize that despite all your hard work, you will always be 1-2 pens short of what you started with. If this makes you feel bad, eat some chocolate.

8. Use rubbing alcohol and paper towels to clean up the tables should any ink get on them. If you can’t find rubbing alcohol use hand sanitizer.

This craft is so easy, I wish there was an IKEA right in Elk Grove, and I’m not just saying that because I like to mindlessly wander through the store while eating cinnamon rolls.

Honestly!

And now, time for the perfect Valentine's Day song...