It’s the not-so-special time when I have to evaluate myself
for work. It should be easy, yet for some reason (besides software malfunction)
it feels worse than amending my taxes by hand, and as a person who has amended
her taxes by hand, that’s saying something. I’m staring at the form, and the
answers are coming, just not the right ones, because when it comes to work,
even if you cough your liver up on the floor you’re supposed to keep trying. And
while I do try pretty hard, my philosophy falls in line with what my mom wants
told me:
“I’m not Jesus. If I start off with 100 sheep and one
wanders away, I think, hey, 99 is pretty good.”
(Other things my mother is not: a plumber, a cashier, a
doctor, a taxi driver, an ATM…)
So I’m trying to finish my evaluation, but written below is
everything that keeps popping into my head.
Document performance
goal status in this section
Goal: To not strangle
anyone.
Status: In
progress.
Accountability
The ability to take
personal responsibility and ownership of one’s own actions and behaviors.
Me: I am well
aware that my every moment is being tracked by cameras and keystroke
technology.
Communication
Effectively and
appropriately communicates meaning within a particular context.
Me: I speak English
and write legibly. (Guess those four years of speech therapy is paying off…)
Customer Focus
A commitment to
identify and meet the requirements of all customers, both internal and
external.
Me: Are we a
business? ‘Cause businesses have customers. Libraries have patrons, so technically
I cannot answer this question. N/A.
Professional conduct,
appearance and attitude that is courteous, helpful, considerate, appropriate
and business like.
Me: I’m the hot librarian.
You can tell this by my shoes.
Ability to adapt, to
support and support changes in the work environment.
Me: I can work
without AC and around mouse droppings.
Acts consistently
with professional and organizational principles and values; understands that
dissenting opinions are necessary for a healthy organization.
Me: I’m always
right. Dissent is not allowed. Resistance is futile.
Plans, monitors and
adjusts work to accomplish goals.
Me: I change my
goals to fit whatever I’ve already accomplished.
Organizes
information, identifies key factors and underlying causes, troubleshoots and
recommends solutions.
Me: I troubleshoot
to the point I will sooner let a computer explode than call IT.
Works cooperatively
as a member of a group or team toward a common goal.
Me: There is no “I”
in team, but there is one in “Mojito”.
Demonstrates an
appropriate level of technical literacy, as well as the ability to adapt and
apply new technologies to improve the library’s service to customers.
Me: I know to
dial 9 before calling out.
Supports the library’s
commitment to customer service, vision, values and strategic priorities. Comprehends
and acknowledges relationships.
Me: I’m not sure
if I can be a public defender. I know, we said we were spreading our wings, but
there’s a reason I decided not to go to law school.
Part of me (the crazy part) wishes to send this in, while
the other part of me doesn’t want to hear what would happen if I did. If anyone
has any suggestion for me, feel free to put them in the comment section below.
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